Monday, May 08, 2006

My Vote Goes To......

I have decided, what with all the shenanigans that have been going on in recent months that I will put forward a new candidate for these new elections. After the shockingly bad leadership we have suffered under Blair, and the knuckle dragging alternative (sorry Biased BBC fans - that translates as ugga bugga chugga ug ug ugga) and I am proposing a new candidate. It may seem a strange choice but I am confident that this candidate will enjoy the respect of all the electorate. My nomination for Prime Minister sperm.

Ok, now hear me out. Will my sperm actually perform any worse than the oafs that are currently running the country??? I think not. Sure they get all excited and hyperactive around an egg cell, but so does John Prescott. It is used to stiff competition, it has a lot to compete with believe me. It breaks down barriers to achieve its aims. It's athletic, eager and single minded. It is the perfect political candidate. With this in mind I will put my sperm forward for the next campaign. It will campaign under the slogan 'Fertilising Your Future', quite catchy but I'm open to suggestions. The campaign starts here. VOTE SPERM.